Stick a fork in me, ma!

Always on the front lines of the battle against winter’s cruelties, my mother takes advantage of the holiday season to arm her daughters with an arsenal of personal care products. I have more lip balms and packets of pocket tissue than I can keep track (not that I’m complaining; it’s nice to find a chapstick in every forgotten purse pocket), but Mom reached a new level this year with the 8 oz tub of Kiehl’s Creme de Corps Soy Milk & Honey Whipped Body Butter.

It is, in fact, just like whipped butter, and as the Kiehl’s website describes, it “deliver[s] deep moisturization with an addictive scent.” It’s not unpleasant to smell slightly of the butter dish all day, but because of the stuff’s uncanny resemblance to the real thing, I can’t escape my memory of “The Butter Shave,” the Seinfeld episode in which Kramer slathers himself with butter.

Hey buddy.

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