unsolicited info

At the post office, there is a small sign next to the register that explains that the postal workers are required by law to ask if there are any hazardous, perishable, or breakable materials in the customer’s packages. The workers at my post office reliably ask this question, every time, of every customer. Sadly, in our troubled times, the customers feel the same way they do at airport security checkpoints: that they are under intense scrutiny, susceptible to punishment should they fail to properly answer this important question. This means they feel they have to reveal what is in their package, to reassure the postal worker that they are definitely not breaking the law and endangering America. “J-j-just paper,” they stammer, or “it’s books! I’m a student, see!
“By the way, do you take Crimson Cash?”
I could tell my postal worker that my package contains what is possibly the greatest mix CD ever constructed, but I don’t.

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